Reply To: BPS

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Amanda Tucker

Hey Verna.

Thanks for posting.

The BPS reads a little too technical and corporate vs brand-led.    Take a step back and think a little more about Mom or Dad / the ideal client and talk more about what is driving their decisions for this range of products for their children?   What are their values and beliefs around educational/family learning, helping get children ahead?  How do they want to interact with their children?  How important is their development and why, and how important are their child’s happiness and smile as they learn, and why?    If you can dig a bit deeper into these emotional values and beliefs you’ll have a brand that truly connects with your ideal client.

For your ‘Reason to Believe’, you can make this a little more personal.  Rather than say ‘created and developed by parents’,  put yourselves in the spotlight and reference ‘we’ and talk about your motivations for creating these fabulous products.   Your ideal client, what’s to hear that you are just like them and you create this brand FOR THEM because YOU BELIEVE… etc etc

Does that help you work on draft 2?